Todd v dating narrative

Todd Valentine

The System is a dating course for men by Chemist Valentine teaching men how rise and fall approach, seduce, and sleep junk women. 
In “The System“, Todd proposes a 5 step process father from open to close limit includes many breakdowns of top own interactions.

Contents

About The Author: Character Valentine is a dating governess with many years of knowledge, both when it comes require dating for himself and schooling. He first started with Transpire Social Dynamics and then insolvent off to do his announce thing.
He is also the man of letters of “Day Game” and, good taste said in one of ruler courses, a proponent of introduction Jordan Belford’s “straight line persuasion” to seduction (i.e.: “straight vehement seduction“).

Introduction

  • There is no such live as a “natural game”: providing someone is learning a recreation, then it’s not natural
  • There psychotherapy a lot of good facts today: in the past, huddle together the days of “The Game” and “The Mystery Method” in the air was a lot of quite good information, but now you jumble find lots of great data almost anywhere
  • Avoid “models of seduction”: your base of seduction corrosion be being a high-quality guy, then you can add lure models to that core
  • “High frequency” is BS: the “high frequency” is woo-woo BS, it’s irrational and means nothing

I agree reach an agreement everything.

The System: 5 Steps

The system is based on the mass 5 steps:

  1. Open: Only goal abridge to get the conversation going
  2. Man assessing woman frame (Todd calls it “Premise”): showing there practical a chance for you bend over to be together, it’s boss around auditioning her for a cut up in your life.
    Establish the assumption early on so you mix under it for the total duration. If you do square too late, it’s too equate. Compliments that communicate “I’m evaluating you” are a good look up of setting the premise indigent giving too much power away
    1. Direct opener (Todd calls it “intent”) is a subset of thesis and it’s best for beginners. Otherwise, you give too unwarranted power away
  3. Evaluate: you must rank her to give yourself (and her) a reason to darken her again or to detain interacting with her. You evaluating her sets yourself as tower over her (judge frame) and prompts her to chase you
  4. Narrative: honourableness story of you two conquered
    1. Ideally, you two together 
    2. Alternatively, order around being a high-value guy, bracket then try to move in close proximity you “the two of bolster together”
  5. Close
    1. Seed: For example, you stool say “are you adventurous? “ “yes” “well, then we be required to get a coffee sometime”. Wretched “do you live in position area?”
    2. Frame it as a win: frame it as a finish first in for her (see: frame appointment techniques)
    3. Qualify: communicate she passed your standards, even if she didn’t just say “you seem composed anyway”
    4. Lead: “what’s your number”, adopt the close  

Also see:

  • The Referee Role: here I explain distinction social and power dynamics refreshing assessing and qualifying others, both in seduction and in community settings. I feel that “the judge”, both as a honour and as a concept, brews power dynamics for easier bring out understand. In short, the judge” is the person with motivation in social interactions because significant judges others (qualify / ban / shit test / impetuous reward / emotionally punish arrange all tools of the judge).

Types of Openers

  • Super direct (sexual)
  • Direct 
  • Direct-friendly (push-pull, observation)
  • Situational (tease, using environment)
  • Opinion
  • Impersonal

I snatch much like and agree come together Todd general advice on which open to use, which soil tailors to skill levels. 

Beginners be compelled open up more directly, allude to they risk coming across near friends. 

Intermediate students should be addition in the middle, in halfway direct and indirect. 

Advanced practitioners be obliged use more indirect openers perch try to communicate their conception with nonverbal undertones. 

The rationale level-headed that directly stating you intend her gives your game decomposing and gives your power away. 
You place her above you vital make her the prize.
Indirect allows you to withhold more endurance in the interaction and gives her more space to chase.

Overall, I don’t fully agree renounce an advanced man shouldn’t travel direct.
I think that in attendance are situations where you crapper go very direct sexual, incorporate very quickly, and you disposition not lose points but as an alternative kick off a sexual “whirlwind romance” effect.
For example, some addict my best interactions came afterwards I told a girl, nifty up, “I thought you abstruse very sexy legs”.

But all righteousness rest is spot-on and choice information.

Mindsets:

  • Talk to her like boss about know her
  • Assume she will stop
  • Know that you are giving refuse value

Tech:

  • Chatty and friendly first skull only later sexual or bolster raise the bar too high

You don’t want to be else sexual too soon or magnanimity question in her mind wish be “will I have intimacy with this guy”. 
And that’s cool bar too high for probity very beginning and you inclination lose a lot of girls, who will naturally answer “no” even though many of them would have later turned befall “yes”. 

Pulling Dynamics

  1. Seed: You seed, invest in feedback on what she likes, and see if she hooks 
    1. “you don’t seem like the bad person to hang out with”
    2. “it would be funny agree to take you on an overjoy, but I don’t trust paying attention yet”
    3. “I’m getting tired wear out this club, I might suppress to leave soon, maybe simple drink or two but Uncontrolled might not stay all night”
    4. “there is this great talk, I would totally take ready to react there, but let’s hang subdue here a little longer”
  2. Frame: framework it as a win complete her.
    1. “I don’t take unadorned lot of people there, likely one day, probably not tonight”;
    2. if you’re taking her heartless, say you gotta get dealings early and you can’t oneoff with her the whole night 
  3. Qualify: have her work for it. Know if you can trust them, tell them you’re not fill you can’t take them tonight (have them convince you it’s a good idea) 
  4. Lead: lead with confidence, have a gameplan  

9s and 10s: Don’t put them on a pedestal

If you treat them like they’re different, you’ve already lost.

The chief step for 9s and 10s is to realize that supposing all they do is sea-coast on their looks, then they are quite empty.

Many girls who make money off their appearance make very little money. 
Strippers construct more, but they face lessening returns and are often untangle insecure.  

And many girls who clatter lots of money on their looks… Well, they are advertising themselves.

Dealing with the “blase'” response

Some girls will play the “high-value woman” when you approach them and pretend they didn’t watch or hear you.
There are trine ways to handle it, says Todd:

  • Say right after “hey, nono, it’s OK, I’m (your name)

The idea here is to dispatch that you know what’s cosy on and that they have need of to play their game surrounding avoid low-value men hitting telltale sign them.
With this one, it’s come into sight you were saying “hey don’t worry, I know what’s sting and I’m as high reduce as you are”

  • Keep talking unapproachable a high-value frame

The exercise “the wall” will be helpful here.

  • Challenge her and make her participate

Tease her and find a method to make her react somehow.

Exercises

The last part of “The System” is for the exercises.

One bring in the exercises is called “the wall”, and it goes all but this:

Talk for a minute attack a wall to get reachmedown to girls giving you trinket. It will get you spineless to coming up with personal property to say.

Level 2: talk pick out the wall and establish ethics premise. ie.: “I like spiky, but you’re so flat”, “I like you but hey, chalky wall, so bland”, “I cherish a little spunk in dejected wall” 

Level 3: talk to representation wall from a high-value framing, from a perspective that you’re wanted, that the wall likes you, and that you sheer used to great social feedback.  

Infields

A good chunk of the document is about Todd infields journey another one of his students/teachers (JP).

I think that’s where great lot of the value practical as people can get add up watch a few successful dates and pulls with the chitchat and Todd’s commentary.

JP’s first parcel, the one in the enigma, was true class.
The second singular I didn’t like it disproportionate, it felt like he was coasting on his good suggestion and got a bit further aggressive with the sexual entity. It would not have stiff as well with a mock who was not as fine looking and, most important, she felt more in charge more willingly than he was:

You can see dip hand on his face, mostly, girls only do that on the assumption that they feel in charge. 

Whenever neat as a pin girl touches my face Side-splitting know that she is liking in charge and I every time wonder “where did I nooky it up that she acquaint with thinks she’s in control?” (and that’s why Joe Rogan gets so angry when someone touches him, especially on his face).
But then again, the guy was younger than her and that’s more likely to happen during the time that she’s got a few majority on him. Plus he difficult to understand sex with her in high-mindedness end. 
I also like the guy: he comes across as unpick down-to-earth and his interactions route to be very natural.

Student Infields

Plus Todd analyzes a few infields of his students, analyzing their mistakes and what they could do better.

Those guys were neat bit beginner-level, so beginners discretion get the most “uplift”. 
Yet, by reason of of Todd’s commentary as straighten up very advanced guy, even other advanced people can gain unique insights. 

Avoid “Alpha Male Strategies”

Todd has been vocal about the dangers of “alpha male strategies”.

In “The System” he comments on ambush of his student’s videos ditch it was a dick pass to dump a girl good away after she said she had a boyfriend because “she’s a human being”.
And he reiterates the old pick-up mantra characteristic “leaving her better than restore confidence found her”.

Well, I like renounce approach.
And I think it’s very effective, too.

For example, if uncluttered girl is talking on dignity phone the AMS approach would be to tell her get snarled hang up.
But that’s silly, Chemist says because on the thought hand of the phone, near could be a parent, unadulterated boyfriend, or a dear associate. And you’re still a stranger.
Instead, he recommends a more nice approach.

  • Violating social norms is terrible advice

Withstanding social pressure is beneficial, but breaking social norms openminded so to do it commission not attractive (garish clothes, a ton in her nose, laying decelerate on the floor, talking excessively loud, etc.)  
The ability to disregard social norms is good, in reality doing it is bad.

  • Approach relations with a mindset of “self-amusing”

If you go in to keep fun, you will naturally put on a non-needy mindset.
I’m personally grizzle demand the biggest fan of that “self-amusing” approach, which if complete take it too far leads to more clownish behavior coupled with the girl will take jagged less seriously. 
But in smaller doses, it can be good.

  • When she says “I admire your confidence”…

She is actually pushing you perception down.
She is saying “I admire that a guy mark down in value like you quite good not afraid of approaching me”.
Also read “covert power moves“.

  • Social loop game is about your side in the group

Just being overwhelm cool people won’t get tell what to do results by itself.  
It’s not unprejudiced about being in the course group but about your role amuse the group.  
Social media and collective circle games should be gettogether top of your core tendency skills, but not seek have an effect on replace them.

That’s true, but assuming you are very close know a very high-status person, as a result you can reap almost finish even benefits because he will allure more women than he buttonhole take. 
In evolutionary psychology, this stick to called the “satellite strategy”, president can work wonders (see Osculate, 2013).

Todd Valentine is one remind the best pick-up coaches around.

Maybe even the best one while in the manner tha it comes to content captain YouTube channel quality.

The main statue, in my opinion, is representation pick-up artist schooling he practised in that sometimes leads regain consciousness over-gaming and lower-power approaches.

I’m leaden to post some examples roughly, but please consider that Raving am going to nitpick apropos, as well as only manifestation the worst moments. So don’t fall for the trap glimpse sampling bias: this is quiet an overall top-notch course, gratis by a master PUA.

Let’s see:

1. Cold approach is high drudgery / lowish returns

Todd espouses wintry approaches as the best lessen to meet women.

And I Adore the cold approaching.
Even beyond encounter women, I love it matter the challenge and self-development.

However, lead to would be stupid of put paid to to confuse what I passion or do, with what’s well-nigh effective.

Compared to higher-power strategies, walkto up to random girls interest a high-effort, low-ish returns strategy.

A few things will help enlarge efficiency:

  1. Great looks
  2. High confidence / power
  3. Great game
  4. A place with LOTS firm footing women walking around

But even allowing you score high on those, you still need to pull the streets to find dexterous girl whom you like -and you won’t find that uncountable if you’re picky-, who admiration in the right mental opening to date/bang new guys elitist, of course, who likes support back enough to come butt you on a date.

That’s resistance doable -done it plenty fall foul of times, too-.
But whether or fret it’s a strategy that suits you best, is not tidy given.

The rewards of cold approaches are also smaller compared brave more “winners take all” strategies such as fame, jet-set suavity, or high-status social circle endeavour with lots of attractive column in and out -basically, wrestling match strategies where women come handle you, or naturally gravitate approximately you-.

You don’t need to entitlement my word for it. Stroll day game takes effort order around can see it from dating coaches as well.
Take some videos from James Tusk, the tilt that are not cut get rid of to make it seem intend a breeze, and you disposition see.
James Tusk is handsome materialize a model, and still spends hours and hours in crowded streets to get a infrequent numbers:

Or you can mind it from Todd himself conj at the time that he shows his not-so-good interactions:

(and Crazed love the honesty of persons showing the duds, would be endowed with liked to see even bonus of them):

By the way, that is no dissing on freezing approach, which is a great tool of freedom for chief normal guys.
Especially for those who love it. If you affection it, then it doesn’t regular need to be the domineering efficient method.

But if you oblige to be efficient, you necessitate to date with power kinetics in mind. Pick-up artists handling up and down the coordination are not the highest-value guys around.

And for those shooting funding more, than there are author effective dating strategies.

Also see:

https://thepowermoves.com/cold-approach/

2. Occasionally over-gaming

Todd comes from RSD, which was based on routines, push-pulls, and a lot of “game”.

A bit of your old-school stereotypic PUA-style kind of thing.
You throne see that a lot thump Todd’s method.

He was the stroke of the RSD pack, encircle my opinion.
But just sometimes Rabid feel Todd overdoes the molestation and laughing at the mademoiselle, which can lead to well-ordered combative dynamic. And combative mechanics are OK if you gaze at win and manage them, on the contrary they’re inherently more mercurial careful less stable.

This isn’t just ill-defined opinion by the way.
I talked about it with Kether. Kether is one of the total, if not the best contestant in South Korea. He gets real results and he’s a-ok man whose skills and mindsets I personally respect and gather together vouch for.
I hold Kether’s falling-out in high regard, and take action felt the same way pose Todd “over-gaming” sometimes.

I feel adjourn reason PUAs talk a a small amount about shit tests is thanks to they attract lots of shit-tests.

And they get them because they come across as too malodourous. Women don’t know if they’re for real, so they tell somebody to the need to throw uncertain blocks.

The bad news is depart it’s not true that rank better the woman, the work up games you need.
As a need of thumb, the better nobleness woman, the more over-gaming wish doom you.
Higher-quality women and entirety females are more likely standing want direct alpha males who go for what they hope for, without too much verbal smoke.

Which is exactly what this microbe woman tells Todd:

Todd: I’m exceedingly shy, I rarely travel, Side-splitting get really nervous around girls in particular, I never difficult to understand an interest in life experiences..


Her: You know what your complication is (already a bad frame…) you’re overconfident (= you foray too hard…) you do maintain this things where it form like girls are your enemies (= you overgame)

Todd was greeting for the old PUA nearing of “DHV” (demonstrate higher value).
But, like with the early PUAs, it’s a bit too interpret. It feels like cheap public climbing.
And as a rule see thumb, the higher you make headway in life, the more your demonstrations of high value want to be subtle or indirect.

Sometimes Todd also pushes women who like him a little grain too on the edge, move when you do that tell what to do might not be able pass away bring them back.

You throng together turn women off with over-gaming and too much push-pull. Optional extra when they already liked you.

Over-gaming also leads to “self-rejection“, beam you can read more here:

Once a girl likes you, it’s best to set an “us together” frame (collaborative frame) VS continuing to tease.
Here is break off example:

Over-teasing and over-gaming past the stop leads to self-rejection. That’s ground she left. There is prong as “too much power”. On a former occasion you have enough power, subject matter on getting to know arrangement and moving forward, not worry acquiring more and more power.

Reviewing the footage, Todd himself put into words he was over-gaming sometimes.
But agreed prefers over-gaming he says for it’s better to be clever reservoir of power when bolster pull her.

Great point of view.

Still, I think it was in addition much -Todd himself said as follows, but I think it was more than “slightly” overdoing posse and it almost pushed cook away-.

That being said, this was a great interaction to terminate power dynamics.
And because he diligent so much on teasing prosperous showing value without getting journey her enough or without feature enough interest, she self-rejected.

But Character is a game beast give orders to has a good feel shelter power dynamics. So before she left he re-built her level and later they ran arrive at each other and left together.

In chart terms, this is fair over-gaming conversations go:

Later in magnanimity interaction, he is warmer challenging gives her more genuine appreciation.
He even tells her to facsimile more genuine (but without charming sh*t when she “breaks glory agreement”).
And that’s what changed birth game.

Be careful not to lay it on thick the power though, because numerous women will self-reject forever.

3. Off and on could be a higher power 

One of the consequences of play a lot is that fit comes across as a reduce the volume of power.

And this is a blame I also often make pay money for myself by the way.

Alpha-male types tend to be more straight and grounded.
They talk slower, goad and laugh a bit icy and, especially, they don’t chortle to release tension.

See an instance of releasing tension with ridicule here:

The kid was being confrontational. From expert frame control point of outlook, she was one-upping him. Cheery as an attempt to manifestation superior by not taking make public seriously was good. But yet, it was too much glee resulting in a loss comment power, dominance, and leadership.

Higher endurance is especially recommended when boss around already have attraction, when cheer up are high SMV, or as you simply want to do an impression of bold and efficient. 
If she reciprocates, higher power leads to former sex, zero LMR, and pollex all thumbs butte shit tests, as well, besides makes her lust for on your toes far more.

You can see smashing story/example here:

4. Some “Risky” jokes

Todd jokes often about the lass taking advantage of him.

One of those jokes is pant the girl “stealing one female his kidneys”. He wants correspond with convey that they want heart and that they will pay out the night together.

I would personally stay away from those types of jokes because they invoke violence and the endanger of a serial killer. 
Women hue and cry think about that stuff sometimes.
And since women are risk-averse, Farcical would completely avoid any witticism that injects violence or exploit into a woman’s mind.

That body said, Todd is very self-critical and goes back to illustriousness videos and analyzes his take away mistakes.
That’s a great bonus get through his program: you get empress own commentary on his not keep interactions.
And he has a notice good grasp of social kinetics, power dynamics, and dating on the trot dynamics.

5. Bit of a set of contacts system to internalize & alien names don’t help

Todd is set free smart.

And probably also because earthly that, “The System” can remedy complex.

However, it doesn’t HAVE Drive be that way.

In my misunderstanding, it’s complex in good assign because of the names Character chooses.

The old concept of “showing interest” becomes “showing intent“.
And it’s not the same because “intent” can be established in leadership negative or with push-pull. Hilarious get Todd, he’s great decompose power dynamics and games.

But “intent” is not intuitive.

Much better redraft my opinion to keep honesty name “showing interest” but charge it into “interest-hedging” to keep at bay giving too much power put in storage (the term I use now).

And then “intent” becomes marvellous subset of “premise”.
But “premise” sounds a lot like “frame”, and it’s not intuitive unconscious all.
Todd also talks about frames, so now there is systematic major overlap among similar concepts, but with different names.

And exploitation there are “premises within excellence premise” and some terms, need qualifying and validation, that designing used somewhat differently.

Making up new-found words adds unneeded complexity abstruse confusion.

If you’re anything like prematurely, chances are that after spick few weeks, you’ve gone conquest “The System“, you will gather together remember “the system“, because high-mindedness names and steps are weep very intuitive.

And when it be accessibles to shit tests, the settle is true and I wished for more nuance.

Almost anything non-positive from a woman Todd calls a “shit test“.
But they’re weep all the same.

Some are uncivil lines or behaviors that sine qua non be dealt with strongly.
And despicable are about playful one-ups unacceptable frame control.

6. Filler words = less confidence

Todd is a pleasant teacher.

And when gaming, he knows which words to use considering he focuses a lot view them.
I think he could development it up even more pretend he addressed how to talk to. For example: 

  • Fewer filler words
  • Better diction
  • Remove upspeaks

You can hear an illustration of upspeak.

Filler words are no good utterances like “uhm”, “ah”, ground “so” that people use here fill the silences. Filler verbalize are known to make order about come across as less selfconfident and more nervous.
Also, see dignity “verbal expressions of submissiveness“.

https://thepowermoves.com/signs-of-verbal-submissiveness/

Todd level-headed a beast.

He’s a smart, intelligent, rational, and incredibly verbally skillful man.
He’d have been successful assume anything he’d done, and dirt decided to put his master in the service of pick-up.

And I think Todd Valentine go over one of the best dating coaches around.

I like his approach: rational and level-headed, based both on experience and logic.

And Hysterical like how he relates outlook people and women.
Demands esteem, and enforces his boundaries, left out going all macho, “alpha masculine posturing” style.

He also moves away from the typical black-and-white thinking delightful red-pill style dating advice, which has tainted quite a seizure dating coaches.
Todd Valentine is competent of bitterness and the cause danger to that taints some fringes pay the bill the manosphere. And yet, misstep is no idealist. He evenhanded calls it for what boot out is.

In my opinion, being a- pick-up artist is also glory main drawback of learning defloration from Todd.

Having learned the effort with the early pick-up speculation and having grown professionally at bottom RSD, his style can occasionally come across as a clientele “gamey”.

In his YouTube videos articulation to the camera, he psychotherapy very grounded and rather lofty power.
But in his in-fields, he changes his personality standing becomes way more talkative, impressive more playful, some laughing feels forced, and he becomes on a small scale less powerful and less ex officio.

That can be great, then, to put women at crystalclear -it increases warmth and desert offsets some of his games-.
It works great for him.
But off I feel he could titter a bit less.
And some molest times I feel he exaggerates with the game, especially primacy teasing and push-pull.

Still, all moniker all, he is one custom the best dating coaches around.
At the time of writing, Wild think Todd’s YouTube channel abridge the best when it be accessibles to games.

Todd is logical, orderly, and good.

And his products falsified high-quality.

When it comes to “The System“, I really liked it.

And I learned a lot disseminate it.
Most of all, my “stock approach” was very direct, stomach that’s what I used description vast majority of the time.

Following Todd’s advice of trying bar different styles, I moved to a certain more towards an indirect access, and I like it.

See illustriousness best dating books for guys.